Waving the White Flag

I have boys. I realize this is a known fact. But when i go into my bathrooms? It is most obvious that i have boys. Young boys. Boys who have potty trained in this house. Boys who are, evidently, a bit careless. And in a hurry. And maybe turning to continue a conversation whilst peeing causing them to spray the baseboards on the other side of the bathroom. That one's just a theory.

So i know that having boys who stand up to pee can lead to problems with bathroom cleanliness. Add to that a mother (c'est moi) who is less than stellar in the area of housekeeping/cleaning and the problem grows.

I've gotten to the point that my bathrooms depress me so much that i simply don't clean them anymore. Until we have guests coming over. So that equals about a once a month cleaning. Not enough when the pee is flying many times a day. A few months ago, i tried to really scrub them. I'd tried my natural remedies. I'd tried a pomus stone to get to the stains on the underside of the seat. So I went to the most toxic, bleach-containing, thick blue-gelled toilet cleaner i could find. And all i managed to do was take the finish off of two of my toilet seats. Not what i was going for.

I went to Costco on Thursday to upgrade my cellphone at the Verizon kiosk. As i meandered the store while my phone was being setup, i saw, on an end-cap, just what i needed. I didn't even think about it. I didn't calculate cost. I didn't call Doug for an opinion. I didn't care so much that the material wasn't porcelain like the existing seats (i've looked online and can't find them). What i saw said, "Easy to clean," "Easy to install." And they were white. Bright, glistening WHITE that called to me. I grabbed two and put them in my cart without another thought.

I have to say. That's the best $28 i've spent in a long time. Love them. The boys are sure to appreciate the "slow-closing lid" feature. I'll be back for two more on Monday. Problem solved.

The Armor of God

I've felt a near sense of urgency lately to teach my children to be able to recognize and avoid the evils in the world. I feel like there is so much more "out there" to be concerned about. While i think many of these things have always been around, the prevalence and ease of access is greater than ever (i.e. pornography).

I read somewhere that the average age that boys are first exposed to pornography is eight. Eight years old. I want my kids to be able to talk to me, to feel comfortable asking Doug and me questions if there's something they aren't sure about. I hope we can have open and frank conversations. This was not the case in my own upbringing. While i don't remember it being a problem, necessarily, i do remember that when my mom attempted to talk to my sister about the birds and the bees (and i happened to be in the room, too), that we both basically laughed her out of the room (i was probably 8, my sister 11). We just didn't talk openly about pretty much anything. I think she threw her hands in the air and gave up.

I planned a Family Home Evening to address this and i'm really happy with how things went. We read from Ephesians 6 about putting on the whole armor of God--the analogy of physical armor to spiritual armor. We compared soldiers going out to battle in their armor for protection and how we can put on our spiritual armor to avoid temptations and be protected. We specifically talked about movies, foul language, poor treatment of others, dirty jokes and "pictures of naked people," whether in magazines or on the computer. Bode's eyebrows went up in disbelief when that phrase was said (i suddenly have Beevus and Butthead in my mind--"Heh-u-heh. Dad just said NAKED!"). We talked about what they could say or do in different situations and that they can always come to us with any questions. It was a good little dialogue and both boys participated a lot.

We then made a "shield of faith" and a "sword of the Spirit" for each. They had fun battling each other and seemed to enjoy the FHE and actually listened and learned.

At bedtime, Keegen said to Doug: "So, if we're at Ian and Jed's and they want to watch a bad show, i can just tell them that will destroy our armor of God. That's awesome, right Dad?"

I can't wait to get a call from the boys' friends' moms saying they were admonished by my four-year old when they offered to put on the Chipmunks Squeakquel...

POST-EDIT: I tried to find the article i read that said the average age boys are first exposed to porn is eight and i can't find it. i googled it and everything i see says the average age is eleven. So i guess i was off a bit. I did find this statistic from enough.org, "Nine out of 10 children aged between eight and 16 have viewed pornography on the Internet." Maybe that's what i was thinking. So, whatever the statistics say, it's a rampant problem and i'm glad we've addressed it and hopefully opened up communication lines with the boys.

Six Months!

So, i remember when it was just me and Bode, the time did NOT go by so quickly. And i also remember feeling that, FINALLY, at 6 months, I was functioning again. Thankfully, with subsequent children, i have bounced back a little bit faster. The time has flown. I can't believe Soren is 6 months.

At six months, Soren:

• has a fuzzy little head! It's so cute seeing her fine baby hair grow in.
• a foodie. She loves to nurse. She loves to eat solids. She usually eats solids for breakfast and dinner.
• is very very vocal. Lots of squeaking, shrieking and squawking. All happy, fun noises. She pulls those noises out when she thinks she doesn't want to be in bed. Nice try!
  
• is rolling like crazy. If i put her on her back, she immediately rolls to her belly.
  
• has her two front teeth! Darling.
• gets up on her hands and knees and rocks. i guess she's threatening to crawl, but isn't yet. She pivots around in circles when she's on her belly.
• is a big girl. She completely fills out her 6-12 month clothes. We'll see what she weighs when she has her well-check next week.
• likes to put her feet in her mouth when she's on her back.
• enjoys the exersaucer.
• does a "no-no-no" head shake that i can't get enough of.
• reaches out to be picked up.
  

The boys are still madly in love with her, and the feelings are mutual. It's been a joy to watch my boys love their sister.

Random Thoughts in Hope to Jumpstart a Bit o' the Blogging Bug that I Seem to Have Lost

We've all been combating a bug. I say combating because none of us have been severely impaired as i slather everyone with thieves oil and place elderberry syrup in front of breakfast (lunch and dinner) plates for chugging. I've stayed pretty much healthy--just that threat of illness in my throat. Keegen and Soren were congested for a couple of days. Doug, the non-elderberry/thieves user, fell victim. I'm sure it didn't help his cause that he's been working 70-80 hour work-weeks for i-don't-know-how-long now. There appears to be no improvement in sight with his job. Resumes are being sent out to seek other viable options (meaning, jobs that would give him his life back, i guess).

Because Doug's immune system bit the dust, i, the ever helpful mate, took over teaching his 6 year-old Primary class today. While i'd like to claim i did this out of the goodness of my heart, i really just didn't want our family to look as flakey as we most likely do by flaking out at the last minute and making the poor Primary president scramble for a substitute. I'd also like to claim that i had a super attitude in taking on this task, but it was offered to Doug with such comments attached as, "You owe me BIG" and other under-my-breath grumblings. In the end, it went well. Nine kids and i kept them pretty well engaged. Oh, and my boys? Seriously awesome behavior in Sacrament meeting. Bode read through the Friend magazine and I thought, Wow! Six years old is a good year! There is hope! Keegen did pretty well (as he ate the Wheat Thins as slowly and quietly as he could). Keegen does not have a "quiet voice" and really doesn't know what that concept is getting at. So he was loud when talking, but for 3 almost 4 years old, he did great. I felt good about it. They're learning. We'll see what next time brings.

I have a new obsession. ("You are an obsession. You're my obsession." EVERYBODY NOW!). I've been making Soren these cute little felt hair clippie things (to go on a headband for her at the moment since she's hairless). I made some for all of our girl cousins and sent them off as a Welcome Spring gift. I'm working on some felt Easter eggs and i've taught myself to do some embroidery stitches (you can learn anything on the internet). Kind of fun to feel crafty and creative.

I spent Saturday in the kids' rooms clearing out clothes and rearranging rooms. I have this big house that i've yet to figure out how to organize. We had the boys in the same room for awhile, but it just wasn't working. I didn't like the mess of the room and Keegen woke Bode up every morning no matter what. At like, 5AM. So he's back in his own room. The rooms are a little cleaner. Keegen no longer wakes Bode up. And everyone is happier. (Keegen was NOT happy with the change initially. He was very sad and claimed scared-ness. But he's fine now). It felt really good to go through the mounds of clothing everyone has and finally throw things away, hand them down, Goodwill them and just simply reorganize. It's been bugging me for a long time. Doug, in his weakened state, was helpful in keeping the kids entertained and holding Soren so i could get a good few hours in. He also moved dressers from room to room (again). Soren officially has no clothes. She is 6 months old TODAY (post to come, i suppose) and she's been out of 3-6 month clothes for awhile now. I stuff her little bod in them anyway. I bought a bunch of 6-12 month at Old Navy thinking it would last for awhile, but, nope. So at least now i can justify a little shopping (since i know what she needs). Looking forward to that.

Speaking of clothes, i either need to start actively losing some weight or break down and buy some bigger dress clothes. I have nothing to wear come Sundays. Today, after trying on everything in my closet, i put on a size 4 skirt. Barely got it up over my butt. Couldn't zip it more than 1/2". Dug out the old Bella Band and schlapped it around my waist to hide the gaping opening on the side. It's a bad scene around here if it's not jeans and t-shirts.

I'm really enjoying our new (well, almost a year old) ward and a number of women i've met in the ward and who are also moms of kids in Bode's kindergarten class. Nice to have some new friends.

I'm amazed at how well Bode is doing. I'll have to make his own "Now that I'm Six Years Old" post, or something like that.

Keegen will be 4 next month and is planning his Ironman party. Wanna come? Doesn't matter that Bode didn't have a true "friends" birthday party until he was 5. He saw that Bode had a party, and he now expects to have a party. We will NOT be having 15 kids over. I told him he can invite 4 friends.

It's a typical Colorado/Front Range spring. Nice days. Then snow days. Lots of wind. This is my first year--after FOUR years here--that i don't hate it. It's finally just the way it is. Kind of nice to accept something i can't change! And when it's a nice day? You better believe we enjoy it.

My sister is at the beach this week and i wish we could be there. I miss the beach. And i miss my sister. And i miss her girls. And. There's a Friendly's Restaurant there. And they have THE BEST Reese's Peanut Butter Cup Sundaes. And i really want one. She got a five-scooper tonight. And i'm totally jealous. And i better go to bed before i find or make a suitable substitute for that and eat the whole thing myself (thus not helping the whole fitting-into-Sunday-clothes issue).

Longest Day Ever

It's Spring Break. TWO long weeks of Spring Break. We're supposed to get 6-12 inches of snow over the next two days. Doug left for Maryland yesterday. Keegen is sick. Soren is sick. Bode is B-O-R-E-D.

I always feel badly when we have a day like today. A cooped up day. A day where i had nothing planned. I didn't feel like we could have kids over because of the sickies. I didn't push to send Bode to a friend's house. We were, for a few brief hours, going to go to an indoor trampoline place. But because of the impending storm, we bagged it (it still hasn't started snowing yet). I couldn't get motivated to do anything crafty with the boys. I've been grumpy. The boys have watched a ton of TV. Soren hasn't taken good naps.

The one good thing we did was an impromptu family home evening. I made some cards of the Apostles/First Presidency last year and lamenated them. So we did a memory game with them to start talking about and getting excited about General Conference in two weeks. This way the boys can recognize some of the people giving talks. When a match was made, i had a little bit of info to read about them (i.e. how many kids they have, hobbies, interesting facts; etc.). I need to make some cards of the female leadership in the church so the boys don't think only men are in charge. If it hadn't been "impromptu" i might have had my act together and had some ready. Anyway.

Here's hoping for a better tomorrow.

Bode's 6th Birthday Blowout!

Bode's birthday party happened this past Saturday. True to form, even though Doug and I had 3 weeks to prepare, we were scrambling to get things ready the day and night before. I need that looming deadline to get anything done. But it came together and was a really great time. We had 15 kids (including our own), 3 adults, 4 activities, and a lot of fun. We divided the kids into 2 groups and had games upstairs and an obstacle course in the basement. Here's a glimpse...

Doug dubbed these "bat-a-rangs" (like boomerangs) and were used in the obstacle course

Each child was armed with a marshmallow shooter

We had a pre-game team meeting to explain the game plan, what things were and what you were NOT to do with them (i.e. no throwing bat-a-rangs at people, we do not shoot marshallows at eyeballs; etc.)

I think they were taking things seriously...

Pre-obstacle course target practice

I think he was having a good time (laughing as someone walked into the wall while blindfolded for "Pin the "S" on the Superman")

This game was dropping "kryptonite" back into the Planet Krypton (the foil covered pretzel barrel). It was kind of a flop, and they enjoyed pelting me with kryptonite instead...

More target practice

Obstacle Course Challenge 1:
Find your ammo (mini-marshmallows in a snack bag) somewhere in the balloon-filled bouncy castle

Obstacle Course Challenge 2: Find your weapon (marshmallow shooter) in the maze

Obstacle Course Challenge 3: Speed away to save the day in one of the Batmobiles

O.C. Challenge 4: No pictures, but they had to use their shooters to knock down a foam block castle.
O.C. Challenge 5: Using their Superhero lung capacity to get the ball up the ramp.
The final O.C. challenge was working together to get their bat-a-rangs off the top of the punching bag (using pure brute strength). The bat-a-rangs fell off the bag and into their hot little hands.

Check out the kid on the far right. I laughed hard when i saw that one!

Yahoo! A bazooka!! (rocket launcher? some sort of anti-aircraft missile?)

Batman (iron-on) t-shirts to take home

And now? i need a nap.

A Full 360

This is a very "stream of consciousness" post and may very well never have a point in the end...

The Olympics are starting soon. I ♥ the Olympics. And we have very awesome HD cable for the first time ever so we plan to watch all sorts of it (like curling at 4AM since i'll be up with Soren anyway). My post title made me think of all the crazy rotations the snowboarders do. Love that snowboarding is an Olympic sport. The last winter Olympics? 2006. We'd just moved to Colorado. We were living in a 2-bedroom apartment just Doug, me and Bode. Keegs was in utero. It's really hard to believe we've been here for 4 years.

I've had a hard time here in these 4 years. I arrived with a positive attitude and a desire to make friends and be sociable and enjoy the fresh start. Then the winters got long. And the wind blew hard. And the wonderful friends i made nearly ALL moved away about 18 months after we arrived. Slowly i was left behind. i was tired. Making a social effort really wears me out. And i didn't feel like doing it again. I worked. I did my calling at church. And i kind of kept to myself. And i ached for a change. I was ready to move. The Army brat was used to moving often. Wanderlust.

Then we talked about having another baby. And talked a little more. And decided "yes." And i decided i need to be happy in the present. Where i am now. And i got pregnant. And started getting happy. And then Doug's work started talking about moving us back East. And i had a moment of panic thinking we'd move while i was pregnant (again). And i settled into my pregnancy. The work reorg has been painfully slow. Lots of stress for Doug. I've managed to not worry much about it. For months and months we assumed we'd be moving right after the baby arrived. We started working on our "things to fix on the house before we sell it" list. Our boundaries were changed and we were put in a new ward (congregation). While i liked our previous ward just fine, this new ward was a good change. Kind of satisfied that "ache for a change" i mentioned. I made new friends. The boys made new friends. Lots of friends with boys the same ages as my boys. Lots of dual playdates. Summer came. Then school started. More friends made. Once things were tweaked a bit, Bode and I were/are really happy with the school. The baby arrived.

In all of this, the understanding was, we're moving to DC sometime. My first moment of panic was over the prospect of being very pregnant during another move. Doug negotiated that that wouldn't happen. But then the realization that i didn't want to move was in my mind. And i didn't really share it. But i was aware of the feeling and the thoughts. It took almost 3 years, but i like living here. I was having another baby. I was rebuilding my "village." I felt like, wherever we are, I will be doing pretty much the same thing: taking kids to and from school and church and other activities. Homework. Dinner. Playdates. Taking care of my family, my home. Why not do it here where we can afford it? Where it's pretty family-friendly? My gosh! Am i ready to put down some roots?!

Work has been a major grind for Doug for the past 9 or so months. He works all day and then comes home, helps get the boys to bed, fires up his laptop and works from 8 till 11pm. And gets up and does it again. Seven days a week. It's really wearing him out. We are happy to be gainfully employed, but it's getting to be too much. A few weeks ago, we actually sat down and talked. Can you imagine? After months of grunting at each other as we pass in the hall, we had an honest to goodness conversation. It started with an offhand comment on my part about going to DC since that's really our only option (going where the job is) and he responded with something to the effect of there being other jobs out there. Which made me say HOLD ON! YOU'RE THINKING ABOUT THIS TOO?? I told him i could see that he's not happy with his job. I told him i'd been thinking about the DC prospect. I told him that our reasons for leaving the DC area 4 years ago are still valid and nothing has changed in DC so why are we planning on going back?

Do you know that we actually considered moving to Salt Lake? If that doesn't tell you that things are dire here, nothing else will!

I don't want to move. I want to stay here. I like my house. My friends. My kids' schools. Our church building will be half a mile from our house starting in April. I can see us being here and being happy for a long time. Even with the long winters. And the wind. And the people coming and going from our lives. I can see that as a positive thing now.

I want to stay.

But i think in the end? We will have to go where the job is.

Gnaw Gnaw Gnaw

What i've been up to:





A teething ring just doesn't compare to her mom's right knuckle...It's kinda too bad it's not detachable. Kinda.

Skate City

I had the brilliant idea to put Bode in the local roller hockey league. It's cheap. There are 5 practices. 10 games. He's excited.

Only problem? He'd never been on roller skates before. I talked to a woman at the skating rink. She said it was possible that he could learn quickly and join the league, but somewhat doubtful (since i was talking to her on Wednesday and the league started on Monday).

So, i did what every mom would do. I pulled him out of school on Friday so he could go to a "learn to skate" class. (i was actually a little surprised at myself and made sure Bode knew this was a significant exception to the rule).

Oh, i wish i brought my video camera. I had my still camera. But no video option on it. Keegen attended too. And it was HILARIOUS.

The way they twisted themselves when they fell? The way they fell when they weren't even moving? The bum-rubbing when they got up off the floor? Bode was easily a head taller than all the other kids on the rink and i hadn't noticed how skinny that kid is. Wow.

So, since i forgot my camera, i found some other footage online that is very close to what he looked like out there. Start it around the 1:20 part! I thought he looked more like a giraffe learning to walk, but this is close!

Oh and i think we'll wait and start the league in March! Get a few more lessons under our belts and graduate from traditional skates to inline...

Damn That Oprah

I used to be a news junkie. Read the Washington Post (mostly the Style section, but also hit the major headlines in the local (thus national) and global news). Watched a lot of nightly news. And then post 9/11 things got, well, depressing. I stopped paying such close attention. I think it's a good thing to be informed and aware of what is going on in the world and in your neighborhood, but i was oversaturated (is that a word?). So, I rarely watch the news (i rarely watch TV but choose to spend my "screen time" on the computer). I get brief news info on Yahoo (when i choose to change my page from "entertainment" news to real news...). I get a great magazine called The Week, which tells me "all i need to know about everything that matters." What i'm saying is, i still have a clue, but not to the point of feeling overwhelmed.

Oh, Haiti. I didn't want to see any footage about it. I didn't watch the news. I read just headlines. I knew it was bad. I wasn't surprised when it got worse. We gave to our Church's Humanitarian Fund (after all of the charity fraud following 9/11, i just give through our Church since i know 100% will go to the people in need).

But still, i hadn't seen any actual footage. Then i checked the DVR today and saw a new Oprah episode. Wyclef Jean in Haiti. I kept clicking through to see what else was recorded. Surely there was something mindless. And upbeat. But i was drawn back to the one about Haiti.

The destruction is horrendous. The loss of life devastating. The continuing suffering in the aftermath unimaginable. The response frustrating. But what breaks my heart? The children. Children who were already living in abject poverty now hurt, hungry, orphaned, dead.

I wish there were more i could do. I wish i could go and help fix wounds, bring food and water, rock a frightened child. These feelings reminded me a little bit of my experience on 9/11. I remember a part of me wanting to just stay home where i felt safe. Then i got a call from work announcing their disaster response and requesting all available employees to report to their units. I went and hoped to be able to help. To not feel so helpless. To feel useful and be actively involved. To do something. I went. And waited. But the hospital was never overwhelmed. Too few people survived when that plane hit the Pentagon.

But Haiti. There are so many walking wounded. I wish i could help. I wish i could do something.

"I would be my brother’s keeper;
I would learn the healer’s art.
To the wounded and the weary
I would show a gentle heart.
I would be my brother’s keeper--
Lord, I would follow Thee."

Springtime in Winter

It's cold. It's windy. The snow hasn't melted from our last storm before Christmas. My evergreen trees are looking a bit sad and on the fence about possibly dying. It's been rather gray and dull, which doesn't happen very often in Colorado.

But in my kitchen? Signs of life. Color. Growth. Hope of things to come, renewal, the future...

In the Beginning...

Question posed to me today by Bode...

"Mom, how were the first people put on Earth?"

My answer had to do with Heavenly Father and Jesus creating the world and people.

"No, Mom. Like, how did they make it?" (He asked this question much more clearly and intelligently than i can remember. But this was the gist).

I asked him what he thought. He didn't really have an answer and asked me again.

My answer was a very vague one about Heavenly Father putting energy together somehow.

Next question?

"But Mom. Who made Heavenly Father?"

Dude. I'm in trouble.

Our New Years Card (in lieu of a Christmas card)

We had a very busy 2009! So much so that I still have my Christmas decorations up as I type this. I claim that I’m stretching out the holidays and enjoying the lights on the garland too much to take it all down. Do you think anyone’s noticed that the lights haven’t been plugged in for a week now? How soon do you think we’ll get a letter from the homeowners association citing us? I do think Christmas came and went much too quickly this year and we had a brief period of mourning that the holidays are already over.

Here’s a quick rundown of what’s been going on in the Bell household…

Doug: Still working hard and wishing he could play as hard as he works. We spent Thanksgiving in Utah, catching up with extended family on both sides. Almost all of his immediate family met us in Salt Lake, which is no small feat. His favorite Christmas gift this year? The Wii. I surprised “the boys” with one, and that included Doug. He claims he’s up late playing Mario Kart so new races and vehicles will open up for the kids when they play, but I know what’s really going on.

Bode: Started kindergarten in August and loves it. All I ever really hear about is recess and PE, but those are the important things, right? He’s excited to be reading and loved playing real golf with Doug this summer. He stopped all programs and therapies for his sensory processing disorder and is doing so well. He’s come out of his shell socially to the point that I sometimes find myself cringing over his goofy antics. My friends assure me that he’s just behaving like a typical boy, which is (sometimes) fun to see! He adores and always wants to hold his baby sister. I think we may have a future baby whisperer on our hands. He will be 6 years old on the 28th of this month.

Keegen: Started preschool this year and it’s fun to watch him make his own friends, rather than always being Bode’s third wheel/tag-along. We skipped the “terrible twos” but are in the throes of the Tyrannical Threes. Holy attitude, Batman! He’s playing soccer this winter. And his wish for 2010 is “to run super-duper fast all the time.” He thinks his baby sister is “awesome,” enjoys trying to slingshot her out of the bouncy seat and loves flying his airplanes right.in.her.face. He will be 4 in April.

Soren: Born on September 28th, she’s got us all wrapped around her little finger. She’s this fat, happy, cuddly little thing which makes being up with her at 4 o’clock in the morning nearly tolerable. We’re so happy she joined our family. I didn’t think I’d be into the whole “girl” thing, but I love dressing her up and putting bows and flowers in her hair. I actually look forward to Sundays and going to church! Is it a problem that my 3 month old has more (and cuter) shoes than I do?

Ashlee: It’s been a year of gestating and lactating. And now, I’m just plugging along with the day to day of trying to keep everyone alive. It’s quite the balancing act. My dad commented that Soren sounds like an “easy baby.” I thought about that for a sec and realized, yes, she is an easy baby. But as I told him, in hindsight, it wasn’t that the boys were so difficult. I just think now that I’m on the third kid, I’ve finally figured out how to do this Mom gig. I’ll start saving now for my boys’ future therapy sessions. I quit work in June to be home full-time. I may have to rethink that one.

We wish you all a happy, healthy New Year!

Barenaked

That's what my house looks like now with Christmas finally taken down. It's a sad, sorry state! I loved the decorations this year and felt very sentimental taking it all down as i think that Christmas 2009 was our last Christmas in this house. The lighted garland that covered our many banisters and mantel. The fireplace to hang stockings. The perfect little spot in our porch roof that displayed the Williamsburg fan i made our second Christmas here. The tiny little wall niche that held the advent. Sigh...We still don't know what to expect, but announcements from Doug's company should be made next month. I know we'll find great spots for these things in a new home and make new memories. I'm just glad i enjoyed our Colorado Christmas so much this year!

CSI

Unfortunately, the culprit who ate something chocolatey in my bed left behind only chocolate crumbs. No clues to his identity...

Hmmmmmmmmm. I knew i wouldn't get my Christmas cards out. So maybe i'll get a New Year's card out. Even though it's already past New Years. Hmmmmmmm.

In the meantime, yes, it's very cold here, so Soren is modeling the latest in baby wear (some things her great grandma made for her). And i even remembered how to tie a scarf!!